As an agent, one of the hardest things we have to learn how to do is identify a client's "WHY?". Why are you buying? Why are you selling? Why do you want to move? When is comes to real estate, a person's why can be almost anything. I think I have heard it all, "I want to live closer to my children", "I like these schools better, for children I haven't had yet", "I hate my neighbor", "I just want to see what my home is worth", "My Mom says it is better to buy", "We are getting married", "I watch flip this house, it is my favorite show", "I don't like renting", "Zillow said my house was worth a million dollars", "Now is a great time to buy". I think you get the idea. The list could go on, and on...AND ON. All these reasons may seem valid, but a lot of the time the emotional connection to these thoughts is missing.
A good agent will dig deep to discover a person's motivation. Whenever I have my initial interview with a client, I always ask, "Why?". Some people are taken aback by the question, and will not want to share that information. They consider their reasons to be private, and are uncomfortable with such direct questions. Some people are insulted that you are questioning them. Often they feel that if they share their TRUE motivations, the agent may use it against them to gain a quick sale. I understand the reaction, truly I do. After all, the key to winning any negotiation is to study the opponent, their motivations and then use them to an advantage. You show me a person with a powerful motivation, and I see a person willing to negotiate. That is why it is so important to sign an Exclusive Agency Agreement. However, a good negotiator will always look for a resolution that is mutually beneficial, and not adversarial. A fact that is often lost on most people.
Why ask, why? When I was first starting out, I constantly would go to my broker with an issue about a client. I would relay a story about something that happened, or what they were looking for and he would ask, "Why?". I can still remember the feeling of bewilderment that would come over me when I couldn't answer. I had no idea! I had never asked.In fact, I failed to keep asking until I learned how important it was through my own trial and error. What can I say? Some people are just stubborn. In order to help you understand WHY a bit better, I have put together a little story. It goes a little something like this...
ONCE UPON A TIME
There was a young couple who was getting ready to get married. They had already worked with another agent in the past, and had written a contract. The contract did not go through, and they were back at square one. Unhappy with their agent they had gained a referral from a previous client of mine, and decided to interview me. In the process of the interview they told me they wanted a ranch style home, in St. Louis County, 3 bedrooms/ 2 baths and a garage. They then stated they weren't too picky, and it had to be priced under $125,000. In talking more with them I found out that they had given an original maximum price of $100,000 to the other agent. Now we were looking at a higher price point, but why? They stated they thought they could get a "better house" in their new price-point. Okie-dokie, seems simple enough. They are buying a house because they are getting married, and don't want to do a ton of work. Right? Wrong.
We must have looked at 25 houses in the $125,000 and under price range. We even wrote a contract on one, but when it came time to negotiate they just walked away. I showed them about another 10 houses, watched their behavior. I asked all the "right" questions, "What did you like about that one? What didn't you like about that one? Did you like that yard? Why not?". The answers I got were never backed by a strong opinion. We were just floating, getting nowhere fast. The houses all looked about the same, were in the same condition and were all relatively in the same neighborhood. I could see the frustration mounting on the woman's face, in her body language and her tone. He would turn red when I asked why he didn't like the house. His answer usually went like this, "I don't know. I just don't like it.".
Now, I know what you are all thinking...You are probably thinking that one wants to buy, and the other doesn't. Or maybe, they just weren't ready. However, I had never seen a more motivated couple. She sent me about 4 emails a day, they went and drove by every house before asking me to show them and both were at every single showing together. Something was missing, and I think they were both missing the point too. The could not agree. After showing all these houses, the only thing I knew was she wanted something that had been moderately updated. She wanted something she could live with for a while before they had to do anything. We had seen several houses like that, and we were coming up empty. We had been looking for so long, that if a house wasn't found fast they weren't going to move. The frustration and stress was proving too much.
Then one day, their parents came on a showing and a miracle happened. While looking at a dumpy house with a two car garage, his dad made a comment about his motorcycle. My client's eyes lit up with excitement. Bingo! I had no idea he had a bike, and motorcycle riders love their bikes. He had been dragging his feet, more than likely unintentionally because he wanted a garage big enough for his bike. I think that he had been quiet in speaking up, and secretly knew that in order to have the moderately updated house that he was going to have to give up his 2 car garage. We had been looking for a house that more than likely did not exist, in their price range anyways. He was hoping we were going to get lucky! On the next outing I sat them both down and said, "I think we need a house with a 2 car garage. I know that we need a house that has moderate updates too, and I don't think we are going to find it in this price range. Something is going to have to give, we can't have both and make your timeline. One of three things has to happen...give up the 2 car garage, the moderate updates or raise the price". I am not one for pushing budgets, the decision about which one of the three things was going to happen, was theirs. The next day, they called and increased their price-point, we found a house in less than a week.
The moral of the story? I had failed to get to know BOTH of my clients. I did not ask enough questions about their original criteria, which was very simple. Had I asked, "Why do we need this garage?", we would have seen 10 houses, not 30 and avoided all sorts of stress for them. Planning a wedding, shopping for a house and making their first major money decision of their lives together is not so easy, and because I failed to ask more questions it was made harder than it should have been.
Personally, if I am ever having trouble connecting with a client I always go back to the "WHY?". There are often pieces that we miss in initial conversations, and there are insights that can only be gained through going through some of the process. Allowing your agent to understand your "WHY?" is the key to a happy transaction. When I am armed with the best information you can give me, I help you get what you want. It is as simple as that. What's your why?
Today is a rainy day, and I love the rain...but for whatever reason, it has been a bit dreary to me lately. When I got to my desk this morning and checked the mail from the weekend, I was happy to find that the Radio Flyer Postcards had returned. We bought our house out of foreclosure about this time last year, and ever since then we have been receiving strange postcards for the previous owner. Actually, I think that they are FROM him, and not FOR him because, they arrive with just his name and our current address on them, no note and no return address.
